I haven't worked in 10 years and I don't know what it feels like to have a job.

In the past, I had a peculiar problem: on one hand, I couldn't get up in the morning and didn't want to go to work. On the other hand, after not working for a long time, I was bored and wanted to go back.
I remember I looked for jobs a few times.
Once, I was about to go for an interview, just ten minutes out of the community: "Damn, it's so hot today, forget it, I won't go."
Another time, I was on the subway for just two stops: "Damn, no seats available, standing is so uncomfortable, I won't go."
Once, I struggled to get up in the morning: "Damn, I didn't sleep well, I'm so sleepy I could die, I won't go."